Quote For The Week

From episode 1610, “Insecurity,” of the animated sitcom South Park on the Comedy Central television network:

Spokesman: [in a commercial] Protecting your home and your family is hard enough! But sometimes alarms on your doors and windows aren’t enough! A new security system allows not only for your doors and windows to be monitored, but your fear levels as well. [a 3-D schematic of a house is shown, with a person in it] A security system that is actually inside you. It’s called IN-security.
Husband: [with wife and twin daughters] We’ll never forget the day we took our twin daughters to the beach.
Stranger: Hehe, what cute twins.
Wife: Thanks.
Stranger: They’re so adorable [whips out a crowbar and assumes a menacing posture. The wife instinctively tries to protect the girls] that I’m gonna bash their f*****g heads in! [the alarm goes off and the stranger runs away, dropping the crowbar. The husband receives the call]
Peter: This is Peter with INsecurity. Is everything alright?
Husband: A white man just tried to murder our twin girls.
Peter: I have a police car on their way with blankets and cocoa. [Next shot is of the whole family in blankets and sipping cocoa at the beach, with police cars around them and police officers investigating]
Husband: I only hope other have people have INsecurity to protect their families.
[A shoe store. A woman is getting her son new shoes]
Shoe Salesman: Well, how’s the shoe fit, pal?
Boy: I think it fits pretty good.
Shoe Salesman: Well okay, hehe, let’s see if it fits better than this KNIFE THROUGH YOUR F*****G SKULL, BASTARD?! [gets out a large knife and slashes the air with it.]
Boy: Aaahh! [jumps into his mom’s arms and the alarm goes off. The salesman drops the knife and runs off. The phone rings and the mom answers it]
Mom: Hello?
David: This is David with INsecurity. Is everything alright?
Mom: [voice breaking] No, a while shoe salesman tried to murder my son.
David: Hold tight. Police are on their way with blankets and cocoa. [next scene, mom and son are in blankets and sipping cocoa while the police investigate]
Spokesman: Don’t let your family become another statistic. Have piece of mind with… [the new company logo appears, with “Custom installation for only $99.”] INsecurity.

“Police are on their way with blankets and cocoa.”

Remember. When seconds count… the police are just minutes away.

By Christopher E. Hill, Editor
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

Share

Tags: , , ,

Monday, January 28th, 2013 Crime, Public Safety, Quote For The Week, Self-Defense
Survival And Prosperity
Est. 2010, Chicagoland, USA
Christopher E. Hill, Editor

Successor to Boom2Bust.com
"The Most Hated Blog On Wall Street"
(Memorial Day Weekend 2007-2010)

PLEASE RATE this blog HERE,
and PLEASE VOTE for the blog below:



Thank you very, very much!
Advertising Disclosure here. Ad captions last reviewed/updated 2/18/17.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
Family-Owned & Operated in Chicago Suburbs! Save 10% Off all items (promo code- home page); Free Shipping (U.S. orders) & Returns. Review coming soon.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
Buy Gold And Silver Coins 90% JUNK SILVER SALE; Secondary Market Silver Sale (1 oz. coins, 1 oz. & 100 oz. bars; Huge Silver Bar Sale (10 oz. individual & monster boxes)! World Gold (Bullion) Coins/Bars also on sale; Free Shipping on U.S. orders $99 and up (only $5.95 below $99!). BGASC reviewed HERE.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
BullionVault World's Largest Online Investment Gold Service taking care of $2 billion for over 65,000 users from 175 countries. BullionVault.com reviewed HERE.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
Presidents' Day Sale! 1-Week Emergency Food Supply $17.76 (thru 2/21); Save 20% off All #10 Cans; Big Savings on "Deal Of The Day" page; Free Shipping on orders over $79. MyPatriotSupply.com reviewed HERE.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
bullet proof vestsWorld's First Bulletproof Baseball Cap only $129; Bulletproof Ceramic Plate (NIJ Level III Stand-Alone) only $169; Bulletproof Backpack/Messenger Bag Panel only $99. BulletSafe reviewed HERE.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
Survival Titles Save 20% Save 35% on All Martial Arts Titles (promo code- home page); Discontinued Title Sale- Savings up to 75% Off Original Price. Paladin Press reviewed HERE.
ANY CHARACTER HERE
This project dedicated to St. Jude
Patron Saint of Desperate Situations



happyToSurvive

Categories

 

Archives

RSS Chris Hill’s Other Blog: Offshore Safe Deposit Boxes

  • Thoughts On Safe Deposit Box Article By The Straits Times
    Yesterday I came across an article on The Straits Times (Singapore) website entitled “Time to part ways with safe deposit boxes.” Business editor Lee Su Shyan wrote Sunday: Growing up, having a safe deposit box symbolised financial adulthood, even more than scoring that exclusive credit card. But that’s not a view shared by many nowadays. […]
  • Next Degussa Numis Day To Take Place February 23, 24
    Speaking of numismatics this morning, Degussa, a leading international player in the precious metals world which also offers safe deposit boxes (for customers) at branches in Germany, Singapore, Spain, and Switzerland, has posted information about the next Numis Day (first blogged about here) at their Geneva and Zurich showrooms. From their website: The Next Numis […]
  • Related Reading: Precious Metals, Collectible Coins Have Shined In The New Millenium
    Just recently, I brought up a MarketWatch piece that focused on rare coins as investments. Collectible coins are often placed in safe deposit boxes for safekeeping. Today, I want to point out a February 2 article on the website of Numismatic News that analyzed the performance of precious metals against U.S. stocks from the end […]
  • Latest Offshore Safe Deposit Box Promotions
    Here are the latest limited-time specials from offshore safe deposit box facilities listed on this blog’s sister site (link included to web page where each promotion is displayed): Asia Titanium Safe Deposit Box (Kota Kinabalu, Sandakan, and Tawau in Sabah, Malaysia)- “Senior citizens 60 years old and above enjoy 25% off safe deposit box rental.” […]
  • List Of Offshore Private Vaults Updated
    Updates have recently been performed on the list of private, non-bank vaults outside the United States (offering safe deposit boxes/lockers at a minimum) located on this blog’s sister site- Offshore Private Vaults. Safe deposit facilities now open for business have been added under the following countries: -Germany (pro aurum, Bad Homburg) -Hong Kong (UltraVault by […]