Humor

Crimea Crisis

I spotted the following (creator unknown) last week regarding the crisis in the Crimea:

Crimea Humor

I don’t know about you, but I think it’s a pretty good depiction of what’s happened to date.

Christopher E. Hill
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Wednesday, March 19th, 2014 Europe, Foreign Policy, Government, Humor No Comments

Pepper Spray Humor

Speaking of pepper spray, here’s a funny comment I saw the other day for one pepper spray product listed on Amazon.com, the world’s largest online retailer:

This is now legal in Michigan. Is a foaming spray so you will see it shoot and harder to wipe off. Has a dye added so the person will be marked for days after you spray them. You want a foam so the wind does not blow it back in your face. Has a very good finger safety so you will not set it off easily. Can is a good size and will do the job for sure…. when the attacker falls to the ground be sure to kick the in the head because they need a good kick in the head so they truly know they are stupid

(Editor’s note: Italics added for emphasis)

Think Amazon may have removed a not-so-nice term after “be sure to kick the” and before “in the head”?

By Christopher E. Hill
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Thursday, January 2nd, 2014 Humor, Self-Defense No Comments

Quote For The Week

“The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.”

-Jay Leno, American comedian and television show host

By Christopher E. Hill
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Sunday, December 22nd, 2013 Government, Humor, Legal, Quote For The Week, Religion No Comments

Chicago Strong-Arm Robbery Thwarted ‘Crocodile Dundee’-Style

One of my readers sent me a link to an article about a witness to a recent strong-arm robbery at a CTA station who pulled out a large knife to successfully prevent the criminal from escaping. Rachel Cromidas reported on the Chicago Tribune website on October 18:

A box cutter-wielding man was arrested for robbing a woman at a CTA station Thursday after a witness pulled a knife to prevent him from escaping, county prosecutors said.

“Mine is bigger than yours,” the witness said to the man as he ran through the Red Line Harrison Street Station with a woman’s cell phone and Ventra card, according to court records.

It’s a somewhat funny story, which made me think of that famous knife scene out of the 1986 film Crocodile Dundee. Although the robbery victim did get bit on the hand by the robber, which isn’t humorous.

In the meantime, more information has come out about the incident. The Tribune’s Rosemary Regina Sobol wrote later on about Joel and Andrew Leach, two brothers from Joliet who were responsible for foiling the robbery. Good stuff, which you can read on the Trib site here.

A couple of things about the incident though.

First, in the Sobol piece, the robbery victim, a new resident from Thailand, confided:

“I was scared, but I thought everything that is important is in my cellphone,” she said. “Everything about my family is inside it and credit card numbers. So I cannot lose it. I tried to get it back.”

You don’t need me to tell you it’s probably not a very good idea to keep information like that on something that’s routinely lost or stolen. I can lose my cellphone today and and barely break a sweat over it- and what’s “inside” of it.

Second, in the Sobol article both Andrew and Joel Leach pose for a photo. Leach brothers my butt. They look like the “Bronson Brothers” (referring to actor Charles Bronson of the Death Wish film series-fame) if you ask me. I like it.

Finally, I can’t help but think Good Samaritans like the Leaches scare the bejesus out of Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel and Chicago Police Department Superintendent Garry McCarthy, who might see them more as meddling vigilantes than do-gooders, and fear they might inspire others to react in the same manner when criminals prey on their fellow human beings and the police aren’t around to stop it. For Emanuel and McCarthy, calling 911 and waiting for law enforcement to arrive would seem to be their answer for incidents like this.

Anyway, nice job Bronson Brothers.

By Christopher E. Hill, Editor
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Signs Of The Time, Part 64

You may have heard about the homecoming queen with a gun in the 80s.

Now there’s this story of an alleged bomb-throwing beauty queen out in Riverton, Utah. From Salt Lake City’s FOX 13 News website earlier this week:

A beauty queen and her friends are in trouble with the law after authorities say they made and threw explosive devices in Riverton…

Late Friday night, cops found several water bottles with aluminum fragments and chemical residue at two homes near 13800 South and 4100 West. The suspects reportedly threw these homemade bombs onto driveways then sped off.


“4 charged for throwing explosive devices from car”
FOX 13 News Video

I hear director Robert Rodriguez of Grindhouse, Machete, and Sin City fame is in town this week for Wizard World Chicago Comic Con. I may have to drop by and pitch this story to him as the basis of a new movie.

Blonde Bombshell: Bomb-throwing beauty queen takes out her competition- and then some.

Soundtrack by various artists, Rockabilly Radio.

Yep. Blonde Bombshell. The movie. You heard it here first.

By Christopher E. Hill, Editor
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Thursday, August 8th, 2013 Crime, Humor, Public Safety, Signs Of The Time No Comments

Signs Of The Time, Part 61

Late last night I took some “me” time to watch the remake of that 1984 cult classic Red Dawn. I blogged back on August 13, 2012:

“Cold Warriors” might remember the flick, which incidentally was the first film to be released with a PG-13 rating. From the IMDb website:

It is the dawn of World War III. In mid-western America, a group of teenagers bands together to defend their town, and their country, from invading Soviet forces.

I also added:

On November 21, 2012- the day before Thanksgiving- Red Dawn 2012 will be released in American movie theaters. According to the IMDb storyline:

A group of teenagers look to save their town from an invasion of North Korean soldiers.

North Korea?

Already, some are saying that the People’s Republic of China with its fast-growing military should have been cast as America’s fictitious adversary in the remake.

Or even the bad-a** Russians (Soviets) again.

But according to Wikipedia:

In June 2010, release of the film was delayed due to MGM’s financial difficulties. The delay came amid growing controversy in China after excerpts of the script were leaked on the website The Awl. The film drew sharp criticism from the Global Times, one of the leading Chinese state-run newspapers, with headlines such as “U.S. reshoots Cold War movie to demonize China” and “American movie plants hostile seeds against China.” One of the articles stated: “China can still feel U.S. distrust and fear, especially among its people. Americans’ suspicions about China are the best ground for the hawks to disseminate fear and doubt, which is the biggest concern with the movie, Red Dawn

In March 2011, the Los Angeles Times reported that MGM is changing the villains in its Red Dawn remake from Chinese to North Korean in order to maintain access to China’s lucrative box office.

So, North Korea became the “new” bad guys.

But get a load what was printed up on the Netflix DVD sleeve label:

Netflix Red Dawn 2012 China Label

“When Chinese military forces invade…”

Too funny.

As for the 2013 remake- not bad. I was pleasantly surprised that the storyline wasn’t exactly the same as the original movie. However, the movie ended somewhat abruptly, I thought. Still, the film was better than I expected. I especially liked the North Korean invasion scene- my butt popped off the couch for that part. And Kalashnikov aficionados will be impressed by the prolific use of AK-variants in the movie.

By Christopher E. Hill, Editor
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Thursday, May 2nd, 2013 Asia, Europe, Firearms, Humor, Signs Of The Time, War No Comments

Quote For The Week

From one of my favorite TV shows, The Cleveland Show (“Brown History Month” episode):

RALLO TUBBS: I’ll just go ahead and be one of the other black presidents. Actually, I want to be the first black president. Who was it?
MRS. LOWENSTEIN: Rallo, Barack Hussein Obama is the first black president.
RALLO TUBBS: What? Washington wasn’t black?
MRS. LOWENSTEIN: No.
RALLO TUBBS: Jefferson?
MRS. LOWENSTEIN: No.
RALLO TUBBS: If Rutherford B. Hayes wasn’t a brother, I don’t know what’s up!

Too funny. Happy Presidents’ Day everyone.

By Christopher E. Hill, Editor
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Monday, February 18th, 2013 Humor, Quote For The Week 1 Comment

On TV: The Simpsons ‘Preppers’ Episode

So I finally got the chance Monday to watch season 24, episode 9 of The Simpsons, “Homer Goes to Prep School.” In this installment of the popular animated sitcom on FOX, Homer prepares for “doomsday.” Originally airing back on January 6, the show portrays preppers as extreme and relentlessly pokes fun of them, but should anyone really be surprised considering this is a cartoon we’re talking about here? Regardless, I was laughing my butt off a couple of times during the episode. The Simpsons creative staff really nailed some of the more humorous elements associated with the movement. For example, the outlandish “why we prep” movies found in droves on YouTube (not all are hogwash, mind you). Most modern survivalists I’ve encountered don’t come off anywhere near as goofy as the ones portrayed on the show. If preppers are willing to remember that The Simpsons is purely entertainment/humor, they might enjoy watching “Home Goes to Prep School,” which can be viewed in it entirety on the FOX website here for a limited time only.

By Christopher E. Hill, Editor
Survival And Prosperity (www.survivalandprosperity.com)

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Tuesday, January 29th, 2013 Humor, On TV, Preparedness No Comments

Chicago CTA Red Line Gone Wild

More often than not, nothing good happens after midnight. Especially here in the “concrete jungle.”

-Christopher Hill, Survival And Prosperity, July 9, 2012

Sometimes, the “jungle” gets downright terrifying, like what happened on a recent early morning CTA Red Line train ride (hat tip Chicago News Report blog)


“2:00 AM on the Red Line”
YouTube Video

Nice rendition of Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros’ “Home.”

As I heard one English football announcer say on the TV a couple of years back:

That image is forever seared in my retina.

Just kidding. Keep shaking that badonka-donk, girl. And pray that “Keith” isn’t around.

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Friday, September 14th, 2012 Humor, Public Safety, Transportation No Comments

QE3 ‘Officially’ Sets Sail

Once again, the Pollyannas who claimed the U.S. economy was doing so well that more quantitative easing wouldn’t be needed… are wrong.

Which is somewhat amusing since legendary investor Jim Rogers noted earlier this month the Federal Reserve was already carrying out “QE3”- at least unofficially.

Well, it’s official now. From the MarketWatch website around noon:

Fed Launches ‘QE3′

By an 11-to-1 vote, the Federal Reserve’s monetary-policy panel has decided to launch a new program of open-ended bond purchases, saying bank will buy $40 billion in agency mortgage-backed securities each month, starting Friday.

In honor of the perpetual “Glad Gamers” and others who for one reason or another were adamant no more stimulus would be forthcoming, I dedicate the following video, which went viral in my Boom2Bust.com days a couple years back…


“She Wants My … STIMULUS package”
YouTube Video

Yeah, that Russian Paratrooper rap sounds real good after watching that stimulus video, doesn’t it?

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Signs Of The Time, Part 52

Spend time on the road long enough and you’re probably bound to witness an act of “road rage.”

You may even be on the receiving end of such frustration one day. Or perhaps be the “rager” himself/herself, should you let the motoring skills of other drivers or road conditions anger you enough.

Ordell Robbie (played by Samuel L. Jackson) proclaimed in the 1997 Quentin Tarantino film Jackie Brown:

AK-47. The very best there is. When you absolutely, positively got to kill every m****r f****r in the room, accept no substitutes.

Apparently, the sight of the venerable Avtomat Kalashnikova is also effective in dealing with “road rage” incidents.

Just don’t be stupid enough to try it.


“Russian Road Rage”
(WARNING: Obscene gesture displayed)
YouTube Video

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Apocalyptic Weather Forecast

It’s July, and the 2012 “End Times” humor is going strong. Here’s a farewell weather forecast from meteorologist Aaron Justus out in Richmond, Virginia:


“Hot Weather in Richmond this Weekend”
YouTube Video

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Signs Of The Time, Part 48

Blake Lively? Never heard of her. Until this morning, that is. From the FOX 411 blog yesterday afternoon:

Blake Lively is on the cover of Marie Claire this month, promoting her new film “Savages.” The actress opened up about her desire to break away from the role that made her famous, as well as her newest character…

On the hardest part of getting ready for her role in the new film, ‘Savages’: “I went to the gun range and learned how to shoot a gun for the first time. It was awful. I asked myself, ‘Why were these things ever invented?’

(Editor’s note: Italics added for emphasis)

Perhaps one of her colleagues- Bethany- might help answer that question…


YouTube Video

As our ancestors found out, rocks aren’t the greatest tools for self-defense.

Not even those free ones.

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Signs Of The Time, Part 45

The following concerns another group of “young” Americans (hat tip goofy girlfriend). Funny- yet depressing- at the same time…


“Fun – We’re Not Young (Yahoo!’s SketchY Parody)”
YouTube Video

I thought the following comment on the video was pretty good:

I feel a real sense of community after watching this and reading the posts. Maybe instead of now aspiring to higher level, we can all just agree to lower the bar. Maybe the new benchmark for success and fulfillment can be having a remote control helicopter.

rmcclane01

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Wednesday, April 25th, 2012 Humor, Signs Of The Time No Comments

Chicago’s Plans For Dealing With NATO And G8 Summit Troublemakers Revealed?

In a comment published under last Saturday’s “More G8 Rumors (UPDATE)” post on the unofficial Chicago Police Department blog Second City Cop:

Anonymous said…

we will build a copy of rock ridge. Right down to Howard Johnson’s ice cream.

2/25/2012 01:33:00 PM

Funniest thing I’ve read in a long time.

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Monday, February 27th, 2012 Civil Strife, Government, Humor, Public Safety No Comments


Christopher E. Hill, Editor
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